Poem: Hiding Behind the Rhyme

Defence mechanisms and ways I divert

Don’t achieve anything

And just lead to hurt

Perhaps I learn what’s important

Or of what I’m deeply scared

But none of that means anything

Unless it’s notebook shared

Validated in therapy

Or used to build my self esteem

That I can be that honest on paper

Even if it’ll never be seen

You are weak and pathetic

I tell myself

Lacking the guts to bring your barriers

down

And I want people to speak of mental health

in the way they would of popping to town

You’re useless and everyone can see it

Your problems aren’t really that big

I’m ok, just fine actually,

.. and then I start to dig

I build a murky hole for myself

Of which I can’t climb out

Dirty, muddy and greasy

That’s what I’m told my life is about

Being tiny and not needing

Successfully hiding away

But I fancy building a bright ladder

not pleasing all by running away

It’s got to be time now

For the walls to come crashing down

For the lid to come off the sewer

For love and friendship to be welcomed

around

For lives positives to penetrate

Now that would really be the dream

Compliments and achievements to find a home within

The vulnerable soul, she’s peeking out

The real and honest person that I can be

I’m capable of saying ‘I need to chat, I’m struggling

Can we have a cup of tea?’

I know that this is it now

And finally it’s time

To ask for help in the real, beautiful world

and stop hiding behind the rhyme

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