Poem: Chew Toy

CHEW TOY My body, my stomach, my chest is a ball A dog runs after it and Occasionally gives it a little chew It’s that lurching feeling That sinking A mix of fluttery anxious butterflies And deep sorrow Heart races and mind is overactive All you want to do is slow your breathing down You are calm, you are calm Get up, walk around and forget to forget the panic Sometimes reality hits Shit, this all really happened The enormity of it all hits you like a truck But just for a second And then it’s the painful, numbness again You are not real and the ball is in knots

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