The world feels painful
Sensitive
Growing up with a barbed wire fence
surrounding me, beyond my stretched out fingertips
Covering me, moving with me
and every now and again the cage floats inwards
and the push reminds me I’m under like pressure
Pores opening so that the rain can infiltrate
Sun burns the pooling water
no one flushes out the grazes
Mud sticks
For everyone else, it erases
Then, the spikes go rusty
I tell myself I’m old, I do nothing
They grate
A feeling person in an unfeeling world
The cold silver only touches me every hour
or so
But the threat is always there
Where’s the kind and gentle
Th soft touch to warm me up, that I appreciate
It’s what it’s like being a trauma survivor
Your skin has been ripped off and
you’re walking around naked, exposed
with oozing wounds
Everyone looks at how disgusting they think you are
But no one knows how to soothe
Internalise, personalise
Little electric shocks
Flashes skirting my pores
I reach my hand out
Dog offering paw, in love
The shocks wilt my wildflowers
But you don’t feel them
They’re there, but you don’t
shiver at every zap
I introduce them to my core
I combine and amalgamate all my
stories
You ignore the dog, kick everyone
else to the curb
I whisper ouch
and wonder what it’s all for
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