I can’t wait to lose my virginity

I can’t wait to lose my virginity

The lifetime of tenderness

inwards

Honesty

Stripped right down

Not defined by only one moment

It could be any moment

One of many

A construct, non-existent

A word that never expresses

what is ‘taken’

Lavishing my insides, in love

Being lifted, Not pulled down

Limitations on expressions

not held

Society not judging

We hold off, ripping into ourselves

What about kisses

and moments?

and feeling alive

What about running on a beach

Like a child runs?

A freedom

Of reckless abandon

Discovering the legs shaking

Feeling linked up inside

And, keeping going

The moment never-ending

A stop put on taking

Unconditionally, we thrive

Taking to stable

and moving into, constant,

faithful, ground

What attempts to sustain us?

We needed something outside of this self

I got to the source

Boundaries accepted

I was taken in, accepted

and I cried

For a universe, mapped out in stardust

Flabbergasted by how together,

and inviting

it, finally, felt

Obvious in your wanting

I thought I wanted that

My intestines, lied

and they looked at, only,

practicalities, as I fell

Being aware of cosmic forces

and Maximising, when we were

pushed to abandon ourselves

All the stages and pages

Contentment and closeness, with

our eyes open

And all is well

Lost eyes, living for my rhythms beats

Mapped maze, home

Safe and found

New neuropathways, lit up

Tasting, no longer a necessary function

or a survival mechanism, a buzz

But the tongue that feels flavour

like a blissful walk

That cherishes every sound

Never having to show anyone

your mind maps

They blaze, there, above the bed

Dissociation that once dripped through

everything

Now, powering me

Like summer days

and

warm, rippling sands

Meaningless words that I

bandied with

That was playing

I never fed.

Particles, better together

Like my reassurances

through self-living

Vibrating into phrases

Hanging onto every word you’ve

ever said

In the weight of everything ever felt

Words, known, but never sung

It lives, like a connection to the universe

and the sparks from everything beautifully

created, that amaze

A speech, that you don’t know

how you spun

No borders, every aura

and the deepest blues,

I’ve ever lived in

Self-living for the moment

Turquoises felt

Like a dog feeling the presence

of their human

It is written there

but it’s the gloriousness

and beauty of what

wasn’t on the tin